Blonde toddler in a lilac sweater grabs her head and screams.

How to Talk to Your Homophobic Family

How to Talk to Your Homophobic Family? Dear Queer Abby, My daughter and I are curious about the correlation (or lack thereof) between mental illness and sexual orientation or gender questioning. We have already begun to stay away from people in our family who believe these things are a “sin” (and there were many). However, …

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Pride Month & Prejudice: Three Questions I Get Every Year

It’s Pride Month (also known in some circles as “June”) and in malls, streets, and corporate spaces across America we’re about to be inundated with a ridiculous number of rainbows. It. Is. Awesome. To me, it feels like Gay Christmas… the anticipation leading up to the events, the feelings of warmth, welcoming, and family, the …

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Learning to love our bodies and enjoy sexual touch.

Great Sexpectations and Why I Assumed I Was Broken

Warning: This post is about sex. If that’s not appropriate for your age or mental state, stop reading now and go Google something like, “Cat Translators” or “Qualities of a Dictatorship” instead. Friendly heads up: This post was sponsored by Bombex. This is not a greedy grab for fame and fortune on either behalf. This …

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Compulsory Heterosexuality & How It’s Hurting Our Children

I have become acutely aware of one truth in parenting: despite my best efforts and most loving intentions, something I do or say to my children will hurt them. They can have the most perfect upbringing and will still benefit from unpacking things that happened to them during their youth. It’s just part of being …

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Face and torso of a black woman looking shocked with two female symbols hooked together signifying a lesbian relationship.

Ask Queer Abby: Why Am I a Lesbian Now?

It’s time for another Ask Queer Abby, where you submit your questions about any and all things LGBTQIA+ and I offer my perspective with the goal of building bridges and not burning them to a flaming crisp. The following question has been condensed from the person’s original message and shared with their permission. Mayday! Life …

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Black business sign that says "Come in. We're Awesome" with two hands holding a rainbow-striped heart in the foreground.

Ask Queer Abby: Is LGBTQ Allyship Good for Business?

It’s time for another Ask Queer Abby, where you submit your questions about any and all things LGBTQIA+ and I offer my perspective with the goal of building bridges and not burning them to a flaming crisp. The following question has been condensed from the person’s original message and shared with their permission. Is LGBTQ+ …

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Pink and blue manual label maker with a red label strip that says LGBTQIA2S

Ask Queer Abby: Label Makers and Why Everyone Is Gay Now

I am honored to receive heaps of private messages from people sharing their stories or the feelings that my blog has brought up for them. But what tickles my fancy even more is when they ask hard questions. I find that most of them come from non-LGBTQ+ folx, parents usually, looking to understand or connect …

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Two hands holding a cutout of a paper heart in rainbow colors.

Prayers and Privilege: What This Lesbian Is Extra Grateful For Today

The hazy late-autumn sun rises through her bedroom window. I roll onto my right side and gaze a moment at her peaceful, rested face. In those soft morning hours, it shows few signs of stress or worries from a life that has been filled with it. Then, as with most mornings when I wake up …

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Three yellow rubber ducks in a line holding a rainbow flag.

The Sticks & Stones Rhyme Lied… and a Tribute to Ducks

“Gross!”  He couldn’t have been more than 13 years old, walking away from the hotel pool with someone who appeared to be his older teenage sister.  “No it’s not,” she shot back, not taking even a second to look up from her phone. They were talking about us. I prayed that my partner Jen, whose …

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Open closet door revealing a thick tangle of clothes with a person's legs sticking out of them.

Come Out, Come Out, Wherever You Are… Or Don’t

National Coming Out Day takes place on October 11, 2021 and is observed in the United States, Ireland, Switzerland, the Netherlands, and the United Kingdom. I was shocked to learn that it’s been recognized since 1988, as I remember first hearing about it just two years ago.  Perhaps it’s only because that was the year …

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Blue fuzzy ball with large googly eyes positioned next to a telescope

The Long and Short of Coming Out Queer & an Ode to Muppets

Sometimes I like to picture Kermit, sitting on a log with a banjo, singing a follow-up to his rendition of “Rainbow Connection” with a new riff called “It’s Not Easy Being Queen.” It would provide so much hope that things will be better in the long term, when you’re in the messy part of coming …

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